oboeinsight

I’m the first to admit I have typos at my site. I’m fortunate to have some kind editors in my family (not professional editors … but they are great readers and they know I don’t mind hearing about corrections I need to make). So I’m understanding when it comes to typos. Sort of.

Today, though, I’m doing a bit of college searching for Jameson, who is interested in going to a school for theatre. I’m pretty critical when it comes to college sites. CSU-Northridge’s theatre page was so darn ugly and uninformative I now have a negative opinion of them, sad but true.

And now I just ran across the Sonoma State Theatre page and what do I first spot?

Comming soon
“Damn Yankees”
October 19 – 29, 2006
Evert B. Person Theatre

Hmmm.

By the way, if any readers have strong opinions about which universities would be strong in theatre arts (in this happy state of California, please), feel free to send me your thoughts.

Please send thoughts in writing. I’m very poor with the whole mind reading thing.

Today is “recovery day”. It’s not all that big of a deal after opera, because our last week only includes three concerts. But still, I need a bit of down time, and then I need to get my act together and work on the symphony set.

Tomorrow I meet with SCU students for the first time. I’m looking forward to that!
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I’m done with Opera. No more until November 8, when we begin Barber of Seville. Now it’s on to Symphony.

Romeo and Juliette had a ton of good oboe lines to play, and I did enjoy that. It’s an opera, though, that I’m ready to leave when it’s over. Some operas I like to hang on to for as long as possible. But Gounod? I was ready to leave.

Onward!
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Warning:
Genuine pattyramble™ ahead. Proceed with caution or, should you fear for your sanity, turn back now. Spelling errors may exist. Nonsense is often the case. Heart rates may rise. Or you might fall asleep. Depends on who you are and how you read this stuff I write!

This is not the whole story of course, but one wonders if the situation has ever been much different. All you have to do is read the letters of Mozart or the memoirs of Berlioz to realize that circumstances have never been easy for musicians, or for anyone who wants to accomplish anything worthwhile.

I do agree that things haven’t been easy for musicians. But the last part of that sentence has me wondering. Is it really true that it’s not been easy for anyone who wants to accomplish anything worthwhile? I don’t think so. But what do I know?

I think some folks have managed to accomplish worthwhile things and the circumstances set them up, it went “just so”, and it was easy and that was that.

And is the writer suggesting that all musicians really care about accomplishing something worthwhile? I hate to burst anyone’s bubble, but I honestly think I want to play music because I love it, and because I happen to be good at it. (And, ideally, I want to “glorify God and enjoy him forever” and music seems to be the way that works well for that purpose, but that desire is often shoved into the background, and being honest I have to admit that.) The fact that it is also worthwhile and, I hope, enriches other people’s lives is a great thing. I would love to think that I’m in it for the good of humanity. But I have to be honest and say I doubt that is truly the case. Sad, but true.

And while music is, I believe, worthwhile, in some ways it’s a really a most wonderful “necessary unnecessary”. (Yeah, I put my quote marks before the period. I like it better. This is my blog. So I get to do things in that un-American way.)

Am I saying music (not just classical, but anything) is entirely unnecessary? Are you all gasping for air now? Well of course I don’t believe that! So breathe … breathe in, breathe out … c’mon … get up off the floor. Air is a “necessary necessary”. Really.

See, here’s the thing: I wouldn’t want to live without music. I think the world would be a heck of a lot poorer without music. I think that people who are struggling and weary and worn are encouraged by music. I think people who are sad and heartbroken grieve through music. I think people who are in a celebratory mood or at a joy-filled occasion celebrate with music. Mommies and daddies all over the world sing to their babies. Children sing songs as they play alone, and sing as they skip rope and play other games. Teens seem unable to let go of music; it is nearly like food. And movies? Movies are scarier because of music. Kleenex is pulled out more often because of music. Funny scenes are funnier much of the time. Tense scenes are definitely more tense. (When I’m too scared or stressed because of a scene I’m watching on the tube I turn down the sound. Things are usually much less intense that way.)

But if music were banned, we wouldn’t die. Not physically. Emotionally, sure. Spiritually, possibly. So that’s what I mean by “necessary unnecessary”. I hope no one bites my head off for writing that! (I have a feeling I’d have to drop the oboe playing if you did that, and, besides, my head is quite necessary for life.)

Am I writing nonsense? I wonder! I’m just doing a pattyramble™ and as I ramble out loud I might write things I’ll later retract. That’s how it goes sometimes with me.

For some classical music simply doesn’t matter. For some, it’s even painful, aggravating, or otherwise annoying. That’s okay. I’ll live. For me, heavy metal doesn’t matter, aside from the fact that it bugs me. Pop country doesn’t matter, except that it drives me bonkers. And elevator music only matters because it’s so annoying it makes me angry. People are different. That’s okay.

All of this started from that quote above, of course. And I can sure take things down a different path than one might think, eh? In any case, the article I’m quoting is here (Note: Link no longer working.) and it’s Richard Dyer’s take on classical music and its future. I do like the article. A lot. I find it very encouraging.

Not that I really feared “classical” music would die off. I believe things will change. They have changed. They are changing. They will change. I believe we’ll lose some listeners and gain new ones as things progress. That’s happened forever, yes? I believe we will never be as popular as popular music is. (Gee, ya thiink?!) But I think it’ll keep on keeping on and so there you go.

Me? An optimist? How the heck did that happen? Hmmm. Something new to ponder.
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Someone who sometimes comments at this site is quoted in this article. I know Susan has often sung the praises of eBay, and it sounds as if she’s had good experiences. All I’ve ever purchased there are reeds, none of which turned out to be something I liked. But then I can’t seem to find reeds I like anywhere! I woulnd’t consider purchasing an instrument there; I don’t have money with which to take chances.

I certainly think one has to be cautious with eBay. I also think that it’s best if people who buy instruments there have more funds than I ever do so that, should they take a loss, they won’t weep.

But hey, Susan’s purchased THREE oboes via eBay. Wow. She also purchased three clarinets. All in the last 18 months. I’m trying not to hold the clarinets against her. ;-)

I’m learning a new piece, which was written in 2002. It’s not easy. It is taking, in fact, far too many hours, considering what you will actually hear of me. It’s frustrating in some ways, but I don’t mind the technical workout; it helps keep these fingers in shape! I had assumed the composer might be a string player, but I just looked up the composer’s bio and come to find out the instrument is … flute. Sigh. So is THAT why some oboe solos begin on low B-Flat (our lowest written note)?! And is that why I have a line that goes down to a LOW F?

NOTE TO COMPOSERS: Oboe only plays down to a low B-flat, below the treble clef. Some oboes are now going down to a low A, but please don’t count on it. And if you want low B-flat solo work, why not choose an English horn? It’s so much more reliable.

I know, I know, a low B-flat on an oboe sounds different than a (sounding) low B-flat (a written F) on an English horn. But STILL … sigh.

SECOND NOTE TO COMPOSERS: All English horns go down to a (written) low B, and we can purchase attachments (and some EHs even have the additional keywork) to play down to a (written) low B-flat. But please, oh please, could you give the EH player something to play before you give us those frightening “out of nowhere with a difficult first note” solos that you often give us? Pretty please? Coming in on a solo on a cold instrument is so darn scary! (I should tell you that the composer I’m writing about above didn’t do this, though; there’s not even an English horn in the work for some bizarre reason; there is picc, bass clarinet and contra bassoon … so why not EH? Sigh.)

I really am astounded when a composer writes for notes we don’t (and can’t!) play. Especially those who are teaching composition. It’s quite baffling. But I see the notes. They are in ink. Go figure!

Unless there’s a joke there that I’m just not getting. Hmmm. Maybe that’s the case? Could be, eh?

In any case, I like much of the work (it’s a bit too long for my taste, and I’d edit it a bit), but it’s a bear, to be sure.
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I often joke here about my age. I call myself “old”. But I’m really only joking, just so you know! I still feel like a kid. Shoot, I still act like a kid (as many of you might agree). And in my mind I even look like a kid. (Should I avoid mirrors?)

I thought you might want to know that. Really. ;-)

Something about being a musician … I think it means we grow up slower. Or don’t grow up. Or something.
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I read quite a few blogs, and many of them can be found to the left of this little post. Some I find amusing. Some incredilby informative. Some beautifully written. Some drive me nuts (if it’s possible to drive a person who is as nutty as I am nuts. Hmmm.). And some just puzzle me.

And no, I’m not going to point out which blogs (and bloggers) do which!

Right now I’m going through my little “what am I doing in this biz?” phase. This tends to happen after a period of confidence. Yes, I did have a period of confidence. I think it was about two weeks long, actually. (When I speak of “periods of confidence” I’m referring to performance, not to teaching. I am confident in my teaching skills. Whew!) So now I’m at the other end of things. So when I read blogs that are mostly about how great the blogger is (and usually include how messed up most other folks are) I just get sort of puzzled.

I suppose not all musicians have this tendency to question their abilities. There’s just this part of me that thinks one day someone will be honest with me and say, “You know, you’ve never been good at the oboe!” It’s as if I’ll finally be caught.

And of course I know this is a Little PattyOboe Lie™—I’m not God’s gift to oboe, but I’m also not horrible.

Except that a part of me thinks I am.

And then there are those moments when I have delusions of grandeur. Those are kind of nice for a very brief time, but a fall will always follow.

Anyone else struggle with this?

I write this honestly, even while knowing my students read these posts. I think students can benefit knowing that we hardened criminals professionals deal with feelings of doubt and incompetency just like the rest ‘o the world. Or at least this professional does.

It’s a battle. One I’m willing to fight even at this somewhat ancient age. (Students eyes often bug out when I pull out a piece of music I worked on in 1973; it’s clear they realize I’m near death and they aren’t quite sure what to make of that!)

Life. So much of it is about coping and balance and fighting those loud negative voices and all that jazz. I think.
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I need help.

Yes, I realize anyone who knows me already knows I need help. But I’m talking about a different kind of help right now.

I just downloaded Tchaik 2, and I want to burn a CD. I tried, and I get a message (in iTunes) saying it’s unable to do this due to a “medium write error”. This is the second time this has happened recently. I’ve not had this problem in the past. Anyone have a clue what I should do about this? I can play the darn music on my computer, but I want to listen to it in the car, and the car I often drive plays CDs but has no iPod connection.

Argh and double argh!

I was browsing the Symphony Silicon Valley site and was reminded that there are recordings of the orchestra there. If you visit the recording page you can actually hear a bit of me there. I’m playing English horn in Rossini’s William Tell Overture. I’m also playing principal oboe in some works because our principal oboist, Pamela Hakl, had taken a leave for a time. So some of the principal is Pam and some is me. I hate hearing myself, I have to confess. I only hear the things I don’t like, and I can’t seem to hear the good. And of course there is always room for improvement. At least for me.
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It’s been announced that Sirius satellite radio and the Met will launch a radio station that will play four performances a week during the Met’s season.

Not bad.

Except the one time we tried Sirius out we managed to connect maybe 50% of the time—maybe less. There’s no way I’m willing to pay for a service that doesn’t work half the time. We were in Seattle when we were giving it a go; maybe Sirius doesn’t work well there? But I’m not willing to give it another go here in the Bay Area. I’m cheap that way.

Besides, I have my iPod. It’ll do fine.
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